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Lost Hammer classics

Strangely enough, it seems a certain amount of thought went into putting out Hammer films - and several ideas never got past the "dodgy pre-production art" stage. Surprising, really, when you consider they didn't make Zeppelin vs Pterodactyls but they did make The Witches.

Here are some of my favourite films that never were...

The Day The Earth Cracked Open

Or "You'll catch your death if you go out like that, love".

Mistress Of The Seas

All the best pirates don't wear much clothing, apparently.

Payment In Fear

"How much is that, squire?"

"Some fear, please."

"Keep the change."

"You're a gent."

Zeppelin v Pterodactyls

WHY was this film never made? We must all write to our MPs and demand a balloon/dinosaur crossover film - it'll save the British film industry.

Vampirella

Buffy's got nothing on this undead Vixen. Unfortunately, she has to keep stopping fighting and killing and stuff, to tuck her jubblies back in.

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All words, logos and drawings are © Chris Wood 2000 to 2010.
All photos, posters, sounds and videos are reproduced in good faith with the sole intention of promoting these films. Why should I be the only one to suffer watching them? If any film makers feel particularly strongly about abuse of copyright on the site, they obviously haven't got anything better to do. You could try Watchdog, but frankly, I think they've got bigger fish to fry...