Legend Of The Witches 1970

Never before have so many worn so little to such dull effect. Legend Of The Witches, purportedly a serious investigation into witchcraft in the modern world, features so many pasty unclothed bodies wobbling across the screen that it's like a live action version of Health & Efficiency magazine. It might have been filmed as a documentary, but it was marketed as a titillating exploitation flick, and rather astonishingly, it fails to spark any interest on either count. The documentary scenes are deadly dull, with tales of gods and goddesses mingling with tedious landscape shots, pictures of wildlife, Stonehenge and other yawn-inducing images. And the witchcraft scenes are so packed full of naked flesh that you end up hoping they'll put something on, just for a bit of variety.
By the end of it I'd learned little about "modern day" (e.g. early 70s) witches - apart from the following:

• Most of them need to visit a gym;
• Witches had to kiss their leader's arse ("Much was made of this...");
• All male witches have bad haircuts.

If this wasn't the message the film makers were trying to get across, then I'm a bit stumped as to what it was. The only moment of even remote enjoyment to be had from the whole film is a point during yet another tedious naked ceremony, which is supposed to have something to do with directing witch magic against their persecutors, when one naked girl turns and looks directly at the camera with an expression which seems to say: "It's shit this, isn't it?"
It’s a rare suggestion from this reviewer, who tends to recommend any old cobblers to the discerning British horror fan, but Legend Of The Witches really is a tedious waste of time. Definitely one to avoid, unless you’re the most rabid of completists.

Last updated: October 7, 2007