Dead Man's Shoes
The Last Horror Movie
Shaun Of The Dead
The Weekend Murders
Kiss Of The Vampire
The Devil's Men
Three Cases Of Murder
O Lucky Man


Ah, childbirth. Nature's greatest wonder, and at the same time bloody revolting. Gynaecology mixes with Sci Fi in Inseminoid, a revolting excursion into the "what if?" world of alien impregnation. Whaddya mean it sounds like a cheap Alien rip-off? Did John Hurt have a clear plastic tube shoved up his fanny as he lay in the middle of an empty disco dance floor? I think not.
Yes, if you've ever wondered exactly what lengths a woman would go to to protect her unborn alien twins, wonder no more, as Judy Geeson goes through a very quick pregnancy and eschewes the usual cravings (chocolate, pizzas with banana on, the smell of tarmac etc) and instead starts ripping her crew-mates limb from limb and scarfing down their remains.
Inseminoid positively revels in its cheapness, with the lighting turned right down low in an attempt to disguise the cardboard sets and hastily improvised motorbike helmets. So what if we can't see much and the sound's all muffled? There's a fair amount of gore - and not just once the pregnant Geeson starts running amok with her assorted sharp instruments. For some reason best known to the producers, within a couple of minutes of the film starting, one of the astronauts has already chopped her own foot off with a chainsaw. Now that's class.
And let's not forget that if you're in a bit of a rush, but still fancy watching a few violent deaths, you could always just fast forward to the end and watch everyone die again as the end credits roll. Now that's what I call a film. No mucking about there.
And you get to see Miss Geeson in the nude, if you like that sort of thing.

Inseminoid (1981)
Director: Norman J. Warren Writer(s): Gloria Maley, Nick Maley
Cast: Robin Clarke - Mark, Jennifer Ashley - Holly, Stephanie Beacham - Kate, Steven Grives - Gary, Barry Houghton - Karl, Rosalind Lloyd - Gail, Victoria Tennant - Barbra, Trevor Thomas - Mitch, Heather Wright - Sharon, David Baxt - Ricky, Dominic Jephcott - Dean, John Segal - Jeff, Robert Pugh - Roy, Judy Geeson - Sandy, Nick Maley - Alien Babies